The following is a portion of a series of reflections on the book Instruments in the Redeemer’s Hands by Paul David Tripp. You may also want to read the first, second, third, and fourth reflection in this series.

Desire and the heart are inexorably linked. Whether romantic love is in view, where the heart desires another person, or familial love, where the heart desires community and acceptance, or even material lusts, where the heart desires satisfaction in objects, the heart desires. At the same time, as mentioned in Heart Problems, the heart is also an idol factory.

Transitively, the heart tends to desire what it wants, and it often desires the idols it has created. In other words, the heart tries to be all things to itself: it produces idols and then meets those idols with desire. The result is idolatry. James 4:1-3 deals with the heart and its desire in great depth:

What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.

Ultimately, our desires–our passions in James 4:3–are not the right desires. We desire self-praise, self-love, attention, and for others to worship us, instead of desiring God-praise, God-love, transparency in Christ being seen in us, and the worship of God.

We replace every God-ward desire with self-ward desire.

But, as Tripp points out, “[James] does not say it is wrong to desire,” and “James does not place the word ‘evil’ before the word ‘desire’” (79). The problem is not that we do desire, but rather that we desire incorrectly. “The heart of every person is a fount of competing desires” (79).

The goal of the Christian is not to suppress their desires, but to win the war of God-ward desire over and against self-ward desire. The desire is between faithfulness to God and spiritual adultery against God–the “sin of giving someone the love I have promised [God]” (82). We are called to depend upon Jesus and his cross for victory over wrong desires, or neutral desires elevating themselves in our heart to idolatry.

The typical approach to this battle is to attempt to reduce the wrong desires. Attention and systems are put in place to add accountability; to reduce exposure to temptation; to fill the heart with Scripture so that right desires might win out over wrong ones. These are all legitimate approaches to attacking the heart’s idols and desire problems. However, there is a fundamental flaw with this approach: all attention and focus is in fact on the wrong desires! Even though a battle is being fought, all eyes are on the wrong thing.

Here, the approach of Augustine, Lewis, and Edwards–followed now by Piper and Storms–is helpful. These men have seen in Scripture a call not to de-emphasize wrong desires, but instead to delight greatly in God, as Psalm 1:2 and 37:4–among many other references–would indicate. In this mode of thinking, the war against idolatry is best won by increasing the desire toward God, rather than controlling or decreasing desires for self. This Scriptural approach aids in the way against sin while magnifying God greatly.

Reforming Marriage
Douglas Wilson
Rating:

I picked this book up as potential supplemental reading to another marriage book I’m using for some counseling, Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas. Douglas Wilson is a well-known reformed author, and I knew I wouldn’t get “5 steps to happiness” or “7 tips for great loving.”

While I continue to think that this is best as a supplemental book, it is good material. Wilson ruthlessly insists that the husband is to worship God, not his marriage; and to head his household with respect, humility, and responsibility. I appreciate both of these views, as I believe they are most consistent with Scripture.

The book is fairly short; 144 pages. That makes it a quick read. In particular, the chapters on “Headship and Authority,” “Keeping Short Accounts,” and the section on Nice-Guy Syndrome in “Miscellaneous Temptations” are excellent.

For the lengths, the quality of content within that short length, and the readability, this is an easy recommendation. I continue to believe that, of what I’ve read, Sacred Marriage is the most thorough primer for marriage. This is a great text to add to that one, though.